This is ridiculous.
My eyes must be playing on me.
I saw a skinheaded guy & I thought it was him.
I couldn't quite believe my eyes that I went down to double check.
Disappointment arises when it wasn't him.
Uncontrollable tears flow.
Yes, it was a mixed feelings like what boy said.
I hate him yet I miss him.

Sometimes I feel so evil & sick.
I looked at their pictures again and again.
I couldn't really describe the definte mentality I had.
I envy looking at family's photo, yet I hate to look at them.

Sometimes, I feel that I'm puerile.
I never thought that looking at happily-taken family photo would upset & bother me so much.
I never thought that going into shops or restaurants like Zara or HongKong Cafe would make me so uneasy.

I hate this.